Land's End Cat and SW Coast Path Limericks

 Having retired from a career in the Police end of 2007, the first thing i embarked on  was to walk the South West Coast path with Catherine. We completed the 633miles Minehead to Poole in 2022, so no records broken or book written there, but what a fantastic experience! On the long daily stretches, sometimes with friends, we started making up limericks, but first i would like to introduce to you the Land's End Cat whom we met, complete with name tag, at Carn Greeb immediately south of Land's End whilst traversing Sennen Cove to Lamorna. March 2014. Sketch Harry Cottey.

Land's End Cat     

People come and go from First and Last

And look to Longships, Scillies,

Dreaming of distant shores.

Where tears are shed of great adventures

And the human spirit is put to the test

 

In the evening sun the Minack plays its opening act

And he too takes a turn for he is none other than

The Land’s End Cat

 

Killer whale, basking shark and dolphins surf the sea

And chough, raven and skylark catch the breeze.

Daffodils, camellias, violets glory in their moment too

Made beautiful in their time on Atlantic washed granite cliffs in Spring sunshine

 

Cafes, guesthouses, gardens, historic houses, all tourism

Fling wide their gates for storms now past,

And locals work the ground, prepare the nets

And smile again

 

In the setting sun the Minack plays its final act,

And he too takes a bow for he remains the one and only

Land’s End Cat.

Limericks

Whilst walking the SW coast path 8^th Nov 2007 from Ilfracombe to Croyde, N Devon.

 

We had to take cover at Lee

As a storm cloud pulsed in from the sea

Yet, no sooner had we donned coats

The rain stopped at a stroke

And so we continued on the coast out of Lee

 

Whilst walking the SW coast path from Barnstaple to Rock, Cornwall. Sept 2010

 

The sensible people of Clovelly

Always wear a shoe and a wellie.

To dine or muck out,

They are never caught out,

Come rain, come shine they’re ready

 

 

The wind blows at Instow up the Torridge Estuary

And the Tarka Trail is the modern rail

Bringing cyclists from Fremington Quay

Now if you should stand at Bideford longbridge

You can nearly see out to sea

But the question is will you ever glimpse

The Appledore-Instow ferry.

 

 

Appledore Appledore

They love that fruit in Appledore

Whether crumble or pie

They win the prize

The Bramley family of Appledore

 

 

Please keep this quiet but the youngsters of Bude

Are really quite rude

I don’t want to preclude or try to imbue

But did you know they surf in the nude

And are quick to exclude all but cool dudes

Then they feud over boards that are skewed

With fins that are glued

To conclude, they watch films that are crude

And exude behaviour that’s lewd

That’s the youngsters of Bude

 

 

Well done my cock said the man at Rock

100 miles is quite a long way

Take off your boots and rest awhile

Sup ale in the old Cornish way....

Hurry now for those buses to catch

To get you back to Barnstaple start

Just in time for a pasty or two

Before the Western Greyhound departs.

Whilst walking the SW Coast path from Helford Passage to Plymouth, 100miles, with Astrid and Simon Selley,  April 2018.

 

The people of Mevagissey can get very hissy if you don't stop at their village on the way.

They have cream teas and fun, where fishing is done

Come to us, stop, oh won't you stay?

 

The mad, bad and sad live at Porthluney

A quaint Cornish cove, its puny.

Yet all are loved by God, each to the very sod

And they swim and dance by the light of the moony.

 

Golfers never excel at Par

Even if they hit the ball very far

Whether birdie or eagle

Or a round very feeble

I tell you, you’ll finish on Par

 

The wind on The Gribbin did certainly blow

With DuMaurier's Mandalay nestled below

A short sharp shower then threatened from the sea,

so we pressed on to Fowey, the ferry and tea.

 

It's so easy to annoy the ferryman at Fowey

if you board when he isn’t ready

For the Polruan side is a very short ride,

£2 please, now steady.

 

From Polperro to Looe, Paul really needed a....

Cup of tea

But there was no cafe around, drinks to be found, 

So he had to wait until Looe

 

Portwrinkle is the home of the Wrinklies

Retired and worn, from the sea and life's storms

It’s all B&B, bingo and Winklies. 

There was an old lady of Beer

Who at regatta was full of good cheer

She said come aside, we’ll watch them go by

I am delighted to see you my dear

 

 There was an old man of Beer

Who drowned his sorrows in beer

When asked why he cried, he simply replied

‘There aint enough fish for a career’